Stuff from June & July 2019

One Problem With Proving Something 

She often told him,

‘All men are bastards,’

but he sensed her vulnerability,

although oblivious to his own,

and sought connection with her

as a source of closeness,

convinced that he could

prove her wrong

and show her that

at least one man

could be

kind and fair and respectful.

The problem, of course,

was that she didn’t want him

to prove her wrong:

She wanted him

to prove her right.

It was really all over

before it began.

         Business As Usual, As Usual  

Celebrity, duty free, Let It Be, GDP

Breakthrough military technology

Mascots, gunshots, cum shots, have-nots

Cool squats, ink blots, money-saving robots

Bacon rashers, sweaty flashers, bible bashers

International money stashers

Halfway minds on armed patrol

Our world is crap on cruise control

Teflon, hardons, zircon, atmospheric carbon,

Salaried felons bullying for Chevron

Ice melt, Bible belt, farmed pelt, looking svelte

Useless crap on a marketing conveyor belt

Bedpans, warring clans, Comic Sans, V8 sedans

Luxury beachfront retirement plans

Water-skiing the North Pole

Our world is crap on cruise control.

Competitions, acquisitions, exhibitions, cruel traditions, 

Making fortunes from munitions

Needing apps, logo caps, marketing traps, mutton flaps

People working till they collapse

Bosses, losses, jewel-encrusted crosses,

Mass-produced taco sauces

Confining souls to pigeonholes

Our world is crap on cruise control.

Prayer rugs, cyberthugs, hard drugs, computer bugs

Small boys giggling about big jugs

Notoriety, high society, public piety, impropriety

Coping with ingrained anxiety

Toxic Reddit, fiscal debit, Chinese social credit,

It must be true because some book said it.

Misconceptions about the soul

Our world is crap on cruise control.

Salaries, calories, art and shooting galleries,

Industries based on imaginary allergies

Blister pack, zodiac, heart attack, no way back

Gym rat flashing a flat six-pack

Unsavoury bravery, generational knavery

Willing submission to gadget slavery

I’m glad that now’s the time I’m old

Our world is crap on cruise control. 

            Heritage 

He played the double bass

in a country music band,

back in the days

when country music was Country,

wore a string tie and a cowboy hat,

but he’d leave the stage

whenever the band played

‘When The Saints Go Marching In’

because he considered it to be

a sacrilegious song.

He believed that bestiality is illegal

in order to prevent the birth

of monstrous half-human babies –

he’d seen the photos

in the sensationalist tabloids

that he enjoyed.

He had a tight little toothless smile

because his granny had taught him

that it’s impolite to show others your teeth.

Dogs know this.

He lived to have several grandchildren,

almost all of whom

had tight little toothless smiles

when they smiled at all.

           Science Answering My Questions 

The professor presenting a paper

to a conference in Gibraltar

on Neanderthal research

that I saw on YouTube

stressed that one of many factors

in Neanderthal people’s geographical range

was the availability of fresh water,

and I thought, Of course! Without fresh water

how could they have made themselves coffee in the morning?

           Specimen and Species  

I saw a huge cockroach

in my bathroom this morning,

happily a rare experience nowadays.

It was on the top of the blinds over the sink

after I got out of the shower.

I ripped off a couple of piece of toilet paper,

rolled the blind down a few centimetres

until the jumbo insect fell into the sink,

squooshed it through the tissue,

and flushed it down the toilet.

I’m much older than it was,

and its species may indeed outlast mine,

but I’ve outlasted it.

Neoliberal Psychological Ideology  

He dismissed the first

of the Buddha’s Four Noble Truths

with a flick of his wrist,

asserting that he didn’t suffer

because he chose not to.

Everything,

he said,

is a matter of choice,

and he chose to be happy.

This, of course, means that

unhappiness must be a choice, too.

Now, since we can all agree

that unhappiness is inferior

to happiness,

this should raise the question of

not only why unhappiness exists,

but why so many billion people,

past and present,

chose, and continue to choose,

to be unhappy.

He modestly chose

not to address this question;

after all, since he chose happiness,

and unhappiness is inferior to it,

people who are unhappy

must be that way

because they’re inferior

to him.

He just may not have wanted

to say this

out loud,

y’know?

You never can tell

what unhappy inferiors might do.

           Lost In The Fog 

The city that is my home

has a deserved reputation for its fogs,

and I do love the foggy winter mornings

and the scope they provide

for my romantic imagination.

The park near my house

can become a habitat

for the Hound of the Baskervilles

or for Russian spies lurking vaguely

behind the leafless trees,

waiting for a contact to stroll by

and say the secret password

so they can pass microfilms to each other.

Only nowadays Russian spies do their dirty

in warm, dry, spotless rooms

staring at digital VDUs.

Espionage without fog, somehow,

seems to me to be

like tacos without hot sauce

or sex without at least

the illusion of love.